It’s super early in the morning and I cannot fall asleep due to this weird episode of insomnia and sickness. After having a crazy week of work and getting super sick (cabin fever and all), I’m ready to retreat into my shell and never come out for the rest of the month. However I don’t have the luxury to do so and it some cases, I truly wish I did.
Taking one step forward and three steps back seems to feel like the appropriate cadence, at least the peanut gallery always reminds me of what little progress I make. When I began shuffling the cards, I was really hoping for a particular trio to come around. But with anything in life, you can only leave it to chance. Many people who are driven, rarely ever believe in the value of luck attributing to their success. It’s working effectively and consistently, day in and day out, to strive for something better (even if it’s slightly better). One unspoken tool successful people forget to mention is, the unconditional love and support of those around them, enabling them to succeed and push through the barriers when the going gets tough.
This was the first time in a while, I felt very alone, not knowing what to do next. I usually have a contingency for almost everything and this is the first time I felt so ill-prepared. You can talk to anyone and ask for their advice. As they lend you their ear, shoulder, time, and attention. When you open yourself up, you also increase the likelihood of being judged (by an apathetic party). In the end you have no choice but to do it on your own because you’re the only one with the scope of the full picture. There was so much questioning I did this week about my future and where I want to be. I haven’t felt content, never have been for a very long time. Therefore one of my main priorities that I’ll be focusing on from here on out, is to finally solidify my own support system and then go on from there.
Now for the cards:
Jack of Clubs: According to the internet and the history of cards, the jack (also known as the knave) is the lowest ranking court card. If we we’re to go by suit, I’m barely above diamonds. This week, I definitely feel like a knave.
Seven of Clubs: Now, with this card there’s many interpretations (and I just realized) in some cases people use playing cards as supplements to a tarot reading/cartomancy. However without getting too spiritual, most people say it’s a card of worry or difficult situations. Again this week is definitely a reflection of that.
Queen of Diamonds: Apparently again the interpretation of this card is of a wealthy woman figure but would bring danger into my life. As they say, more money and more problems but thankfully I don’t know anyone who would fit this description currently in my life.
I hope next week’s shuffle will be better once everything levels off but until the meantime, this is the best that I can do and provide. May the RNG be in my favor sooner or rather than later.